Minds are like parachutes

I saw this on a bumper sticker today....

"Minds are like parachutes, they only work when open"

HHMMM...so true! I think there are a lot of times we THINK we are open minded. But I think we are only open-minded as long as the situation or circumstance isn't tied into us. I have known people who are against abortion, then their daughter, who was lined up for a full ride scholarship at an Ivy League turns out pregnant, then all of the sudden, their mindset changes. Or people who say, they have no issues with homosexuality. At least, as long as it is not in THEIR family.

I think a lot of people today have misconstrued what an "open mind" is. It is not necessarily about accepting, but about not walking in judgment. We can say all we want that we have an open mind, but when push comes to shove, how many times do we shut our minds to different ideas, characteristics or beliefs? We don't even want to hear it because it doesn't flow in the same vein as our own beliefs.

Growing up in a church as a young child where everything was very legalistic, as an adult now, I see where there were so many times I thought I was open minded, yet I sat in my judgment, looking down my nose at things that didn't match what I believed. We don't have to agree 100% of the time. But will we stop, get our mind and beliefs to be silent and listen? Can we actually train our mind to shut up and open up?

I think about what it is like to have the parachute open up above me.....a bit turbulent, lots of noise, some pulling and maybe a bit uncomfortable...but then...
then....the still wind passing as I look from far above...everything so clear....just me, my thoughts...silence...peace...soaring.

....just a random thought.

Hope you are having a great one!

My mini-roadtrip blog!

Greetings all! A few days before Christmas...hopefully you are all ready!

What do donkeys, a shotgun, blackbuck, dinner over the river in Marble Falls, small Texas towns, antique shops and an incredible time have in common?

The answer?

ME!

What an incredible time. I scribbled words in my hand written journal as we trekked this great land we all know as Texas, but I don't even know if my meager words or lame attempts at photography can really do justice. But I will try.

We spent the week exploring small towns. There was no agenda, no time constraints. It was just Terry and I enjoying the incredible outdoors. If you know me, you know I LOVE animals. Terry and I have this ongoing joke about how the list of animals I want keeps growing weekly. On that last, high on the list are donkeys. I would like to have a miniature donkey, the size of a large dog and a spotty regular sized donkey. Part of our trip, he pulled over so that I could pet some donkeys. They were just adorable! As I got out of the truck, they brayed, their eyes lit up and ears went back. The more I spoke to them, the closer they got. It was awesome!! We saw SO many donkeys! So little space....so many incredible animals!

Later in the week, he asked if I wanted to go shooting. I said, "heck ya!" (If been researching dove/quail hunting. It is a sport I think I would very much be interested in because it is amazing to watch these dogs "work") So, with a small shotgun in tote, he found 50 acres we could make camp at and as he opened the truck to display a small arsenal of guns, I got nervous. WOW! He explained the in and outs and as he put the gun in my hand, I started shaking. "Are you ready?", he says.
I nervously nod my head.

As I stand off to the side, he tells me, take a deep breathe in, hold it and pull the trigger. I take a deep breath in, hold it and put the gun down. "I'm afraid!" He takes the gun, combs the hair out of my face as the cool, country breeze caresses my face. "It's ok baby. If you don't want to do this, you don't have to. What do you need?" I look at him and say, "give me a second." I take a few steps back and think...what the heck am I afraid of!? I ride motorcycles for pete's sake! I can ride a quad like it's no one's business. I'm not afraid. OK, breathe. Just breathe. Once we round off the first few shots, this will be fun!

I return to where he is standing.

"OK. Ready!" I take the gun, aim, take a deep breathe in, hold it and pull the trigger. YOWSERS!!!!!! HOLY MOLEY!!!!! WHAT THE!??!?!?!? WOW!!!!!
Let me tell you....it was incredible! WOW! We shot off a few rounds...it was pretty cool!

Let's see...what else to report? Gosh...I could go on and on...we saw so many things, did so many things...all with no agenda! I don't know...what can I say...awesome is just so awesome! LOL! Every night was ended with great campfires, talking and lots of laughing about the day's events. Of course, Terry had to get some hunting in, so we did that for a few hours and he got some more meat for the rest of the year. There was one point that we pulled over to watch the sunset...the sky was SO incredible. I looked in my rear view mirror and thought, "what is behind me isn't so bad anymore."

Anyway, instead of boring you with my simple words, trying to frame them to show the extraordinary, I will just say this....I am grateful.

If you are traveling for this Holiday season, please be careful. Wishing you an incredible Christmas!!!!

Life vs Death.....sadly, I think death wins

When I was in High school, I volunteered at the Ronald McDonald house. The other day, I was remembering my time there. It was an old, small home that had been converted to accommodate several families. Every time I walked in, it felt warm. It was a place that housed families in the midst of incredible battles. Families would stay there while their kids were undergoing treatments to keep them alive.
The other day I got to thinking how every time I spoke with the kids undergoing these treatments, I hardly remember ever hearing fear in their voices or words. These kids were mature beyond their years and very much understood that they could loose their lives. Yet, in all they did, all they spoke, all they lived, there was never a hint of fear. Well, let me clarify, their were cautious words and tears shed out of the fear of what the side effects of the treatment were going to be, but I don't remember a fear of death.
I think that comes with age.

As we get older, if we think our life is in jeopardy, we fear being gone. Not getting to finish all the things we started. Fear of leaving people we think so much of. It amazes me how we pay so much respect and honor to the threat of death, yet so very little to life. I myself am guilty. Guilty of putting value in other's lives, yet, if that life were in jeopardy, the level of value I put on them, the time I invest, etc would escalate greatly. Why is that? Why is it that the value of someone's everyday life is so minimized compared to the thought of death. Do we put so much more value in the threat of death than in the every day's of life? Is it because of fear?

I don't know. I guess just been doing some thinking lately. As the holidays round the corner, I know that it is during this time that we make contact with people we normally don't speak to all year round. (even if it is just in the form of a card) But in all of that, knowing that I am guilty of not valuing the lives around me, I feel challenged to try harder. I know that time slips away. I know it is difficult sometimes. But in that, how many times do we sit in room with people and not engage in their lives? How many times do we have 10 minutes in the car to drop a quick call?

I guess I am hoping that we will all choose to let life motivate us, not the threat of death.

....a bit somber topic today, but for whatever reason, I got to thinking about the Ronald McDonald house kids and how they inspired me so much back then. I don't know what happened to them, but, regardless, their spirit/the memories of them very much still live in my life!

My Wish...

For you...

I hope the days come easy and the moments pass slow,
and each road leads you where you want to go,
and if you're faced with a choice, and you have to choose,
I hope you choose the one that means the most to you.
and if one door opens to another door closed,
I hope you keep on walkin' 'til you find the window,
if it's cold outside,
show the world the warmth of your smile,
but more than anything, more than anything,

My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
your dreams stay big, your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
and while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.

I hope you never look back, but ya never forget,
all the ones who love you, in the place you left,
I hope you always forgive, and you never regret,
and you help somebody every chance you get,
Oh, you find God's grace, in every mistake,
and always give more then you take.

But more than anything, Yeah, and more than anything,

My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
and while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.

My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
your dreams stay big, your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
and while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.
this is my wish
i hope you know somebody loves you
may all your dreams stay big

...thanks to Rascal Flatts for helping me find the words! LOL!
Hope you are having a great one!!!

Friday Ramblings

Greetings all!

It's Friday. It's cold. No, scratch that, it is freezing! In fact, it is colder in my office than it is outside. The heater is out! So, between my shiver, I scribe these few words.

Uh...lets see. I don't really have any topic to speak of, just was sitting here at work and thought I would pose something.

The holidays are right around the corner and I can NOT believe we are already at another Christmas, at the cusp of another year! Where does time go? Last night I was waiting to go to my board meeting and I saw that Rudolph the Rednose Reindeer was on TV. I stopped to look at it for a moment and I got to reminiscing of the times that were. When we were young and the the world was carefree. All that mattered was that I had my blanket and pillows as my mom would make some kind of yummy goodness and make sure the heater was set in our small mobile home. I remember the smells of the house, the sounds, and most of all the warmth. My brothers and I sitting around our meager TV, but so thrilled! (she smiles) Where did those days go?

Then we grow up, each live our lives and develop our own set of ideals and establish a way of our own life. What was, is no more and may never be again. The fights about putting clay on legos or hanging my cabbage patch with a hang-man's noose are now at another level; now they are direct to the heart. We grow up and the innocence or believing the best in each other is tarnished. Time spent together is scarce. But in all of that, we continue to have the memories and in all of that, we have the opportunity to create more. I guess sometimes it is just a matter of putting ourselves aside? I don't know.

What I do know is this...
I love my life. I have the least I have had in a very long time, as far as possessions. I clip coupons to save money here and there. I actually look at price tags before I throw items in my cart. I don't have a large home or fancy car. I no longer carry a $1500 purse, nor am I concerned about a hair being out of place, my makeup being done a certain way or the fact that the outfit I have on doesn't fit right because again, I have gained weight. I no longer put my smile on with my makeup.
In the simplicity I have been thrust into, I feel SO much joy! I feel. I think that is what it is. I am ever-so-grateful for the place I am in. Although things are a bit strained with my family, I very much appreciate the place we are in because I know it wont last. I am grateful for having a brother that no matter what has always been there, without judgment or ridicule. I am ever-so-grateful for a sister-in-law who constantly impresses me with her savy and talent. I a SO grateful for my niece. Every time she says, "Tika" or looks at me with her big brown eyes just melts me! I am so grateful for Becky-wecks who is one of the only examples in my life that I know of who God TRULY is! In all of it, she is unwaivering and truly loves me to a fault! eh....I don't know...I think I am just rambling, but I felt like writing...so there it is! LOL!
I am happy it is Friday and just a few days before Terry and I head out for a week of road trippin. I am SO excited!! We have a great camera so will take lots of photos and I am sure I will have lots to tell when I get back. I sware, we have done more in the few months we've been together than most couples do in a year...and it is all of the small, simple things! Truly, this has to be the love of my life!!! Not just what I need, but he is everything I want. After divorce, I wasn't sure of what, when, where, what after knowing my ex-husband most of my life. But in all of it, Terry was out there. The right moment just had to hit. I have heard so many girls/women speak of their boyfriends/husbands and all they are/were. I would smile with envy thinking, "that doesn't exist anymore and if it does, it won't ever happen to me." well, THANK GOD my word is not the last word!! He is THAT man. I am THAT woman. We are THAT couple. I am grateful!!

Anyway, I digress! LOL!

I will probably get back on to blog right before I leave and then when I get back! Have a great weekend!!!

Some pic's of our camping trip

Me making breakfast







Our fancy-wancy kitchen in the woods! SO love it!








Me relaxing at our camp










Terry and I in front of the lake

It's Christmas shopping time...why not keep in working America's hands

Greetings all!
I hope you are reading this in good health and total happiness!
Between this cold/flu/who knows what the heck, work and life in love, I haven't kept up as much with my blogging.

Let's see...quick updates. I'm getting married.
(I'll let that one sit for a while)

Work is SUPER busy, but I really love it! I am going to be at another one of the house builds this weekend and since I know the family that is going to be in this home, it makes it that much more touching. I am absolutely amazed at the outpouring of volunteers, donors, etc that come in to Habitat on a daily basis. I have a small army of volunteers that are always so eager to help. It is neat to be in this environment. I will take some pic's this weekend and post them.

I have had this crazy flu, cold, something-or-other bug for about 2 weeks and let me say, it has been relentless!! One day, it is sinus, the next day an ear ache, the congestion and coughing doesn't stop. SO much that I haven't slept in 2 nights. Night before last, I was about to tear my head off because it hurt so bad after coughing all night. I finally started dozing off early in the morning, but had to get up to get some stuff for my brother at 4am. I came back and got some sleep. It is the strangest thing to me how a cough knows its sleepee time and it just kicks into high gear! UUGGH...drives me nuts! Well, last night, same drill. Although, this time at about 1am, I got up and tried something different. A friend of mine told me to put Viks on the soles of my feet and put socks on and the cough would stop. So I tried it. HOLY MOLY! I really DOES work! It was even 2 minutes that I had my socks on and it just stopped....and most importantly, I slept! Yowsers!! So great!

STORY TIME!
Terry and I went camping this past weekend. On Saturday night it was 29!!! YOWSERS! Talking about cold! We had a fire going and if you stepped more than 5 feet away, you were freezing. We took some firewood, but it was apparent, we weren't going to have enough. So, we grabbed our gloves and ventured out behind our camp to see if we could retrieve some debris that could provide yummy warmness!
We did it in the early evening so we could see because it gets pitch black out where we were at. We are walking around and every so often, there are these tree stumps that are about 3 foot high. It appeared someone else had already chopped the tree and just left that. Well, they are anywhere from 2 - 5 inches in diameter, so while I hear Terry crunching the leaves under his boot about 20 feet from me, I decide I will call on the powers of Karate Kid and kick this tree stump down. So I position myself into the crane.....uh....ok! I am exaggerating! I step back, kick my leg back and kick it with my left leg. "WHAT THE!??!?" It's like the stump morphed into a huge rubber stick. It sent me flying back and I tried to regain my stability, I am looking around to see where Terry is. I didn't want to give him material to razz me, you know. Luckily, he was no where to be seen! We gather some wood and on our next trip, he and I are together and he sees that stump. (yes, I'm talking about the super rubber stump) "this looks like its ready to go down", he says. I look at him and think, "this will be hysterical!" Just to be fair, I say, "I don't think it will come down." To which he responds, "of course it will!" So, I stand back, he gets into his Karate pose, kicks it SO hard, it sends him back!!! OMGosh!!!! I was cracking up!!!!
Well, life is interesting how it has its own vindication.
Fast forward a few hours. We have our wood, I am at the camp and we have a stack of wood. I am standing over there breaking branches. They are on the ground, I put my right boot where I want the break and with my right arm, I yank the branch til it breaks. I've done this a billion times. Well, I hit a branch that is just bein' stubborn. I yank and yank and the thing doesn't give. I finally get upset and with both hands give it a huge tug. CRACK! As the branch cracks, it literally flings me in the air and I hit the ground completely flat! Terry comes runnin' out asking, "are you ok? are you ok?" I tell him,"give me a second." I started wiggling my toes and fingers to make sure everything is in tact. I then start cracking up! OMGosh!! I can't believe I did that!! Terry starts laughing with me and we laugh til we cry. He notes, "hmm...payback isn't always fun, is it!" I start to get up and he says, "no! Wait!" He runs to the tent. I am thinking he is going to get me a pillow or something sweet. He comes running out with the camera!! LOL! He takes one picture, no flash. "WAIT!" I am cracking up!! "I can't believe you", I say. He takes another and says, "I had to catch your Karate Kid moment!"
Anyway, here is the picture! This might be one of those you had to be there, stories, but what the heck...it was just one of the moments we laughed til we cried!



So, my sister introduced me to this website called Etsy. I have a link to her store on my blog spot. Here is the deal, I wasn't exactly sure what this was, but in looking at this further, it is a really cool deal! It is people across America, just like my sister that have a craft or talent for making things and they open up a little "shop". They have purses, accessories, journals, scarves, scrap booking stuff, etc, etc. LOTS of stuff! As I am looking through their pages, I see things and think, "that would be good for so and so." I know with the Holidays here, we all feel we have to go and buy gifts for people and sometimes there are those people that have everything. But here it is, why not put that money that you would normally throw into a big corporation like Macy's, Target, or JCPenny and put it back into everyday Joe and Joane's hands? I don't know, something about that just resonates with me. Anyway, I have attached a link to the home site, my sister's site and another friend of mine's from high school that makes some very pretty hairclips with amazing flowers.

http://www.etsy.com/

http://http://www.etsy.com/shop.php?user_id=6255377

http://www.etsy.com/shop.php?user_id=6234398&order=§ion_id=&page=2


Hope you all are doing well!



PS
Regarding the getting married thing...uh...ya...that would be a no...at least not any time in the next 24 hours! LOL! (o=

Be Here....

"Be Here.
Be in the moment.
Be who you are.
Good. Bad.
Stop trying to put on a face you think the world, others will accept."

These words were brought before me twice in one week. (The second time because I forgot them, if I MUST be frank.)

Here's the thing. Lately, I have been thinking about how can a person reconcile the heart, the mind and the soul to be in line. My pondering first birthed the thought, "what IS 'in line' exactly?" The fact of the matter, is even as I scribe these words, I don't know what that is. Some that live their lives saturated in religion might say, "in line with God's Word". Then there are those whose lives are based on a standard of faith that might say, "in line with the right thing. choose the right" Then there are those who just live their lives to be happy. Their happy. No one else. They would say, "in line with what pleases you". Of course, there are an array of opinions when it comes to determining what is "in line." For me, right now, I am not sure I completely know the answer. I think the heart, mind and soul all have a common thread, maybe a couple of them. However, do I think that all three can be in line completely? In ALL things? HHMM....I'm not sure! I am on that path now to find out.

However, when it comes to "be who you are". I guess this is something I have been contending with for some time. (I blogged a bit about it before) I am finding that sometimes, people don't always want to see it. It is one thing to live a life where you are always "on stage" with the glory of make-up, wardrobe, lights, etc. But to live life off the stage and show frailty, vulnerability, the softer sides. To show that maybe you don't always have it all together. To show the sad side. To show a side that isn't perfect. Doesn't have it all together. Has doubts and doesn't always put on the song and dance of "it's all good." I am finding that "be who you are" is a lot harder than I ever thought it would be. In fact, so far as to say that it is almost like I feel that sometimes being who you are means that others aren't going to be ok. Feeling like I am wrong or like it just isn't enough. The dynamic of it is...well...so DYNAMIC! For me, I've always wanted to gain acceptance from those around me. It is important to me that my circle is "happy with me". That has meant that a lot of times, the truth of situations, hurts, disappointments, life hasn't always been shown. I guess I understand now why people say the truth is sometimes better to hide.

I feel like I am at a place in my life where so much has changed. But I feel it has been for the good. I feel like I am finally OK to be off the stage and looking at myself in the mirror, I actually like what is reflected. Although a little aged and imperfect, I think she is beautiful. Although the signs of sleepless nights and failed tries show in her eyes, I am still proud of her. Although I look at her and realize that she will probably disappoint one day...maybe soon...I am still willing to put my money on her success. I am finally at a place where the broken reflection is ok. No. More than ok. It is real. It is strong in its broken-ness. It is kind, even through the harsh external. It is happy. It is at peace.

The moment to me now is full of so many questions. Sometims feeling like a disappointment to others. Questions of wondering if I am doing the right thing. Doubts of the person I am and if I am "enough".

But in all that, although, my mind is overwhelmed with so much, my heart and my soul are very much at peace. The reflection is still beautiful. Thru the struggle, I very much feel content. Peaceful. Grateful.

Imperfection is so imperfect! It requires that you get through the flaws and still see the beauty that lies beside and behind it.

I don't know, I am probably just babbling, but just some things I've been thinking about.

I guess...selfiish as it may sound. I know my heart. I know my mind. I know my soul. I know they are good. They are constantly at an aim for joy. With and for those around me. But if what you see doesn't hold the allure or grandier of the stage me and it is too hard to see, to be around, I am left with nothing to say.

Christmas is already here?!?!

WOW! Can it really be? Are we already lassoing in Christmas? The other day, Terry and I were driving to the store and we passed by this equestrian subdivision. I am not lying to you when I say that MOST of the homes that you can see from the main road already had all their lights up! The entrance gates and stones walls were already adorned with garland, lights and bows! ...and this was just a few weeks ago!! How crazy is that??

I mean, I can't say I am complaining because if you know me, you KNOW I am fanatic when it comes to the holidays! So I am loving it!

In fact, as I scribe, I can see a little potted Christmas tree sitting at the corner of my desk. Yes, I am guilty! I am one of THOSE! I know many would say, "what's the rush? It'll be here soon enough!" But for me, I wish I lived in Who-ville, so it could be Christmas always. Just me and the ones I love floating around in a snowflake celebrating Christmas always! LOL!

A girl can dream, can't she?
OH! For my EP family and friends, check out this version of a "Christmas tree"! LOL!

Deer Diary....

This is my Deer Diary.
Before you sit there thinking I misspelled the word "deer", the spelling is intentional. I spent this weekend down south again, just outside of Lampasas, TX. I went hunting with Terry.

OK, OK, anyone who knows me knows that I am an ABSOLUTE animal lover and I would never hurt a single animal. When I met Terry and he told me he was a hunter, I wasn't totally sure what to do with that. But I figured I would let it ride and see where it went. Ever since he and I have been together, he has really opened my eyes immensely. The thing is...I used to think hunting was all about this crazy sport that just takes out cute, little, fuzzy deer. That other than "for the sport of it", there really wasn't a purpose. I mean, yes, there are people that kill for the meat because they really like venison, but come on! Just eat beef!

However, in the past few weeks, I have been learning about over populating, ages of deer, and why hunting really is an important thing. Yes, you have those douche-bags that are just sport hunters and are just trying to get a trophy, but that isn't what I believe Terry and people like him do.

So get this...

We wake at 4am. (which, if you know me, you know is a feat in and of itself!) Terry goes outside to get the clothes he left airing out the night before. (Deer have an incredible sense of smell) He brings it in as I am making coffee. I hear John down the hall getting ready. "You ready?", Terry says. I grunt.

It's 32 degrees outside. I am up at 4am. I am about to go and sit in a deer blind (I will explain this in just a bit) for 5 hours in hopes that we get to put a bullet through a deer....hhmmm? Am I ready?!

I digress. I throw on loads of clothes, including my HUGE insulated CAMO pants, jacket and beanie.

SIDENOTE: What the HECK is up with camo?? I mean, why does it have to be so ugly? Why can't they make something that is more form fitting? Something cute? They say that deer can't tell color. SO then...why don't they make different colors of camo?? I am on a hunt for cute camo...so if you know of anything, please do tell!

Anyway, I digress again. (It amuses me to the greatest degree that I am even speaking of wearing camo! LOL!)

I get my thermos ready with coffee, Terry gets all his stuff and we head out. We are silent. (yes, I know...that is amazing to believe with my loud voice and laugh...but I am!) We trek to the deer blind. Picture of deer blind we were in to the left with my little sheep!) Basically, a deer blind is a box or cover up that you can sit behind to cover your movement. Deer not only have keen smell and hearing, but they have good eye site. Of course, they can't tell color, but, they can catch movement, etc. So we get settled in the deer blind and wait. We have a deer feeder (photo of feeder and deer eating below) set up in the pasture across from us and it is set to go off at 7. A deer feeder is exactly that. It is a barrel filled with corn and it goes off twice daily. The deer start getting used to it so they know when to show up for some free yummy corn. So around 6:30, see our first doe. (Doe is a female, Buck is a male) With my third cup of coffee in hand, I whisper, "Terry." I point in the direction she is. We decide she is too young. Slowly, several doe start coming in and low and behold, a buck! We look at him closer and find that he doesn't look legal. (Bucks have to have a spread of at least 13 inches across on their horns in order to be legal to take (or shoot). We are sitting there in the blind, the feeder goes off and it is deer heaven. They are gorgeous! We watch for an hour or so and decide they are too small. They wouldn't be worth taking because they wouldn't provide enough meat.
There is one buck that keeps chasing this one doe everywhere. Terry begins to share with me how bucks go into a "rutt" once a year. Basically, it means, it is the ONLY time all year that they get to....uh....mate! so they pick up a scent of something that interests them and they go for it full gusto! As he is telling me that, I am looking at him and straight behind him, this large buck comes up over the hill. I point, he turns. As he turns, I pick up the scope to see if the buck we were looking at earlier is still at the feeder. HE IS! Terry says, "its not the same buck!" Before I know it, he is picking up his gun, I am looking at the buck next to us to count his points and see his size, I turn to look at the feeder and BANG!!! I turn to look at Terry and he is breathing heavily, I turn to where the buck standing next to us was and I see him on the ground! OH MY!
I don't know what to say....I am speechless. My heart is beating a million miles an hour. I can hear my breathing....I am in shock??
Talking about adrenaline rush!!! The other does are looking on. (It is crazy! They don't even run! Shoot! If one of my friends got shot, I'd be running! LOL!)
Anyway. We sit in the deer blind for a good 10 minutes not saying a word. Just trying to catch our breathe. He looks at me and says, "do you want to go see?" I take a deep breathe and say, "yes".
We trek over there and the buck is silent. I am shaking. I kneel and touch his warm furr. He is gorgeous. There is no bloody mess as I had envisioned. My heart is pounding as I sit there and pet him. Terry watches me and asks, "are you ok?" I look at him and say, "yes.....I am amazed." I look at his points and start counting. 1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8....9. "He's got 9 points." Terry says, "Ya! And lots of weight! He's gonna be some good meat!" I smirk.
I sit there for a while inspecting him. So many thoughts cross my mind, but not one of them is negative. I look up at Terry and say, "you know why he died today?" Terry shakes his head. "He died because he came up over that hill chasing that doe. He had NO idea we where here! He had NO clue!" I chuckle. Terry laughs.

We sit for a while waiting to hear for John's shot. (He is hunting from a tree in another pasture)
At about 8:30, we hear his gun. We walk back and as we meet John, we start sharing stories of what we saw? How many? Where? Where were they going? How did you take yours? ....hunter stories! They grow larger and larger everytime they are told! LOL!

I will spare you the details of cleaning them and taking them to be processed. However, I have to comment on how I am learning everyday how education not only wipes out ignorance, but I believe so firmly it encourages a greater point of living. What I mean is...I NEVER in my life thought I would be so "OK" with wearing camo, sitting in freezing weather for hours in hope to kill Bambi's dad, mom, sister or brother. However, because Terry has spent so much time talking to me about what they do, how, what, why. He has shared the good and the bad. It has opened my eyes. Because I understand a bit more, I feel that I am able to call something that I thought was ridiculous or horendous even, awesome! Isn't that strange?

I guess you can teach an ol dog a new dance! (Why would a dog be dancing, you ask? I have no idea....I just made it up and I don't feel like reaching all the way up to the delete button to type something else. And it's my blog, so it stays! LOL!)

Anyway, there is so much more to tell, but I was pretty amazed this weekend. Both the good amazed and the not-so-sure amazed. Either way, I am grateful for the time I got to spend out there. I am a writer without words when it comes to explaining the beauty of such an incredible place. This is TRULY God's country!

I leave you now. Homes for the needy must be built and I get the great privlege of helping organize! Hope you have a great Monday!!!

Sketch Book Designs

Greetings all and Happy Friday!

I hope this blog finds you well! Real quick, I have added a new item to my blog. It is some really cool stuff for those of you that like to work on small projects, scrapbooking, etc. It is a business that my sister has started and I am trying to get the word out. Please feel free to get the word out!

On a note, I have never been a fan of scrapbooking. In fact, I would say that my perception of scrapbooking was VERY skewed. I have seen some of the many amazing things my sister does and it has really changed my perspective. For those that don't like the super cutesey stuff, but like stuff that looks eclectic and modern, this is the site for you! The REALLY cool thing about it is that my sister finds design ideas and my brother hand sketches all of them! So they aren't just regular cookie cutter stuff! Check it out!

Have a great weekend!

American's First!

Today is the first morning of making history. Regardless of who would have won last night, I would be starting this blog with the exact same line! The thing is, I am THRILLED that John McCain conceded and chose to truly serve his nation and allow the inevitable to take its course. I think his speech was beyond gracious and his heart of truly loving his country and serving her was obviously apparent! Then, true to Obama's M-O, his speech was charismatic.

Here is the thing. All in all. regardless WHO you were voting for, where your beliefs lay, the bottom line is that first and foremost, we are all American. This election has been unlike any other. People who have voted Repubican all of their lives, crossed the divide and voted Democratic. People who NEVER voted before went out and voted. A generation of young people came out by the swarms standing for a cause and silenced the mouths of those that would say this generation is apathetic. Before we start with our "I won't support that President", I would say this. It isn't about the person. It is about the office. Regardless where we stand on our opinions, I believe there is a ton to be said to those who call themselves "patriotic" yet will not stand and acknowlege the highest office of this great nation! Listen, I am not saying that we have to buy into everything they say and do. That is part of the great traits of this country, is that we can express FREELY our sentiments. But for those that are ready to get on their revolutionary wagons, I would completely challenge you and your so called patriotism.

Last night, I watched Mr McCain's speech and then went over to watch Mr Obama's. As I watched Obama, I thought, "God, protect this man and his family". It is sad, but true. There are still people that walk this great land today that still believe that the color of a person's skin matters. Living in Southern California for a few years, I think I became numb to it. It is a melting pot of races. As I have traveled up and down this great country, I hardly had any issues. Well, that is except for Savannah, GA, where the women at the Coach Store completely ignored me and made it VERY clear I wasn't welcome in their store. Then there was the time I was spit on my a Puerto Rican girl in Southbeach Florida because I happened to be hanging around with a white man. He was my co-worker, but apparently, she thought we were race-mixing. Then when I moved to the Dallas area, I felt it's sting again...so far as being confronted by skinheads. With their swastika's proudly displayed on their bodies, they glared at me, made their comments and completely brought to the forefront of my mind that we do NOT live in a world that is like a Crayola box. Sadly, there are still people who feel that the world is black and white and white is right. My prayers are with the Obama family. What a disgrace to our country if any one of them were to be harmed simply because of the color of their skin! I truly pity the souls of the ignorant.

All in all? We are entering a new dimension. I don't know what to think of it. But I DO know that because I AM AN AMERICAN. And I AM A PROUD AMERICAN, I will acknowlege and respect the office! Jehovah bless America and my heart is that Jehavah will be blessed by America!

It's Election Day!

Well, here we are in THE most historical election in MY lifetime. I am amazed at the buzz around the elections as well as how passionate people are about their candidate.
My feelings about the whole thing are quite mixed. I won't get into the weeds of who I think needs to be president, etc., however, I did want to comment on the tone of the day everywhere I go.

FREE FOOD
Hey! Don't worry about paying for your morning cup of joe, your lunch or even your yummy ice cream desert! It's on retailers today! Yep! That's right. Go in, say you voted and voila! Free stuff! I don't think I can remember a time that it has been this way...I guess all I can say is....ONLY IN AMERICA!

GET THE WORD OUT
I am JUST as guilty as everyone out there saying, "I don't care who you vote for, just vote" or "Get out and vote"...blah, blah, blah. Since when did we become such large political contributors? LOL! It cracks me up that our damaged pocket book drives our passion.

CHANGING PACE
I am finding that there are people that have never voted or hardly voted are actually getting out to vote. I have a friend who said her dad voted for the first time ever...he's 53! WOW! What a different tone in our great country today.

HALF-TIME??? REALLY?
I can NOT remember a time when we had candidates occupying the half-time show on a Monday night football game! WOW! Who would ever think the day would come?

All in all, I am glad that people are getting out, spreading the word, etc. We have an incredible military who has paid and continues to pay a high price for our freedom to vote. It think it is a dis-honor not to get out and do what is our responsibility. I am grateful that I get to live in this great country. And I am hopeful that the results on this sucker quickly without a lot of drama.

All in all, I am walking around today taking a deep breathe of the air that is filled with the hustle and bustle of a society that is anxious, excited, nervous and expectant all in the same breathe of what is to come!!!

Always wanting to live in another time...

As I sit on my bed, wearing my pajamas that remind me of being a little girl, I wonder, "will we always want to be in another time?"

Let me explain.

The pajamas I am wearing were given to me by my best friend. Last year, I was reminiscing about how I remember being a little kid and loving my one piece pajamas that zipped clear across the front and had attached feet. I told her I had looked high and low but my search was to no avail. Well, leave it to her to find all things! I received them last year. Tonight is their voyage evening for this winter. As soon as I took them out of the drawer, I got so excited! I began to reminisce of being a child. Living in our little mobile home. My mom would make "chocolate abuelita" and we would be sitting in front of our TV, listening to the heater going on and off.

So many times I find myself missing what was. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy the life I have today and am certain I will enjoy tomorrow and the tomorrow's after that, but there are a lot of times that I find myself SO longing to go back to the "simpler days". The days when there wasn't a care in the world. Of course, I didn't know those days were so great back then because I was in the middle of them and either I was a kid or I was a punk teenager being a jerk. But none-the-less, I miss them.

Tonight I went and had dinner with my brother. When we got home, we were talking about the cat and he mentioned my cat, "poopie". I was like, "what are you talking about? I never had a cat name poopie". He said, " Ya! The one that used to poop everywhere. He pooped in your pom-pom's." SO funny! I couldn't remember the cat, but I definitely remembered my pooped on pom-pom's! We got rid of that dumb cat. My brother will tell you it's because, "we couldn't have him pooping in the princess' room." I will contend it's because we had too many animals.

But I digress.

So many memories are created as we live each day out. And yet, we don't realize we are in the middle of them. Now, as an adult, I think about the last vacation we took as a family. If I had only known that it was going to be our last. Would I have cherished it more? What would have been different? I don't know. But I do know that feeling like I want to go back and live that life again is something I often long.

SO....for me. I think I will always find a part of me wanting to live in yester-year. So as I close this blog tonight cuddled up in my pink footie PJ's, I will sit here for a moment and think about all that was, but also appreciate all that is!

My weekend at the RRR Ranch

Greetings all!

I hope this blog finds you all well and in good spirits. I just spent a weekend of total relaxation and rest. Terry took me out to his ranch in South Texas and I have to say....it is TRULY God's country out there! It is amazing!

He owns land that sits on a hill and rolls down all around it. He is a hunter, so I got to learn a great deal about hunting. Uh....did I mention it is BOW hunting...wow! What an art THAT is! Pretty amazing really!

We get there and settle into "camp" which really isn't camping as I remember it! There was a home with washer, dryer, sinks, showers, and even a jacuzzi tub and big screen tv....this isn't camping like I remember it! LOL! We got our stuff unloaded and then sit by the fire.

Let me share a little about this firepit. uh...it is HUGE! I do mean LARGE! Well, I love watching and tending to the fire and we didn't want to get it SUPER big, so there was a moment when I was tending it from inside the fire pit. LOL! Terry thought my pappy would get a kick out of seeing that so he took a pic! It was quite funny! We went to bed early in the morning and got up about 3 hours later so as not to miss the morning. Drank coffee and then wandered around. Gosh, driving in at night and falling in love with the place was minimal compared to seeing it in the morning sun! He introduced me to his sheep, of which I have named. (yes, yes, I know...don't name them, they'll become pets and one day have to sit on your plate....so what? I say!) LOL! We hiked up and down hills and pastures as he pointed out what it was before, what it is now and what it will be one day. It was an amazing place!


Well, long story short, I got to experience God's great country. Terry and I sat in a deer blind on Saturday for about 4 hours, but we couldn't stop laughing enough to keep quite and let the deer come in. OH WELL! Maybe next time! We DID however, spot turkey, a red fox and some small "spikes" (deer that are bucks, or males, that have small antlers). We also saw the Black Buck he brought in from India. He has had them about 8 years and says he never sees them...I must be good luck, we saw them 3 times...I even got pictures! (she smiles proudly)

All in all, it was an amazing weekend. I really am grateful and look forward to returning in a few weeks. All my life, I knew I was a "country girl" at heart. This weekend confirmed it for me. The country is the ONLY place I will ever be truly me!

PS
This blogger isn't letting me put up all my pic's so I will put them up in sections and narrate! It's late, I'm going to bed!

I LOVE TEXAS!

Greetings all!

Yikes! It's almost been a month since I last wrote. ...doesn't mean I haven't been writing, just haven't posted here. Time does fly!

So today I was driving home after I stopped at the gas station where gas is $2.47...yep, you read right! Two dollars and forty seven cents! Yowsers! I filled up my little box for a whole $21! Ya, ya, it may not be the COOLEST car on earth, but how many of you can say you can fill up for that!!

Anyway, I was driving home, listening to some good ol Texas country music and this lady drives up beside me. Her window is rolled down and she is telling me, "Your gas cap is open!" I look at her, give her the thumbs up and she waves on by. I pull over, switch on my hazards, and go to close it. I am on a highway that has 3 lanes on my side and I see cars on the lane closest to where I am stopped and as they see me, they all move over to a lane further from me. (I sigh) I LOVE TEXAS! People are just NICE! Genuinely NICE! I get in my little car, heart full of gratitude for this great state and as I look around, see open fields, horses, bails of hay, birds and lots of trees. I am grateful to be in this great state! This, for sure, is GOD'S COUNTRY!!! For those of you throughout the US that would try to dispute that, sorry....no case here! It's shut! I LOVE THIS PLACE!

A whole lot going on here! My family came in and visited and we got to spend a lot of time together. It was a good time and I thoroughly enjoyed it! New chapters opening in my life, of which I shall speak of later....time tells all things, but I am very much loving it! No, not everything is perfect as I journey through these days, but if nothing else, I am grateful for my family, friends, and loved ones. Though my mind gets filled with worries of tomorrow, I am grateful that yesterday is over and keeps moving further away! I know I am not where I want to be, but I am SO grateful I am not where I used to be! The air is cleaner, the sky is bluer and life is beyond just bareable, it is a good one today!

I have so many random thoughts that I have written in the last month, but for whatever reason, they just don't seem "postable". LOL!

Something on my heart today, however, that is near and dear.
Some of you may or may not know, but in my lifetime, I have had to "bury" children, or hopes of them. A few failed preganancies left me empty at times and yes, sometimes I feel the scars that have been left behind. I don't know the reasons as to why, how, and what, but I do know that all things happen for a reason. HOWEVER, I bring this up because today is Oct 15. It is the official day of Pregnancy and Infant loss nationally. (yes, there is actually an organization) So tonight, just as many others across this great nation, I will light a candle and remember those that we never saw and those that maybe we had for a little while and we lost. If you or someone you know has lost someone, maybe take a moment to do that for them. And for those of you who have been so fortunate to see the fruit of a pregnancy and celebrate all the great firsts, hug on your munchkins, TRULY, they are an incredible miracle!

Anyway....hope all is well with all! I will try to get on this and scribe more regularly....I was doing so good! LOL!

Lots of randomness...

Greetings all!

FIRST....a fun fact for you.
Did you know that Armadillo can stand on their hind legs and jump? I did not know that.
The other day I was walking around the lake and an armadillo scared the far out of me! And I got to thinking, what if I upset him ....would he attack? Well...low and behold...stinkin' thing DOES jump! SO...next time you see one, be aware...they can be dangerous to your health! LOL!

Let's see...LOTS going on in these parts! Work, work, work, and more work....OH! And SOME play in all of that!

My fantasy football leagues are doing ok. I was upset this weekend because I didn't change the roster. However, I did OK. This week, tho, I have GOT to have a GREAT week! I am pumped!

The MOST exciting thing happening in my life right now is all around me.....the WEATHER! It is absolutely delicious! Oh my! It is getting cooler....SO nice! (she sighs) So co-see! (as Abby would say)

I have about 4 blogs that I have written but haven't posted...they are a bit "deep" so I think that is why I am procrastinating! But I will get something up.

Coming soon....."I may let you down, but I won't let you go".

BTW, I have to be accountable...
I STILL have not called Brianna, Tonya or Missa! Today...today!!! UUGGH...I suck!

Anyway, just wanted to drop a line. I have a counter on this thing and saw there were mutliple hits in the past few days...I'm sure you all live every day wondering what the heck I am doing and why I haven't posted....ah! Yes....because my life is SO interesting! LOL! I know, I know...I'm a dork!!

Hope you all are well! More to come!

Until then, watch out for those darn armadillos!

I might let you down, but I won't let you go

I read this recently in some lyrics of a song.

Every once in a while, I hear a song or read some lyrics and there is ONE line that just won't let go.
(like Mis-carried life, another blog, in case you haven't read it)

"I might let you down, but I won't let you go"

I got to thinking...

I find myself at a place in my life where my landscape has changed. It isn't a bad or a good thing, it just is. One of the major things I see has changed is the circles in which I stand amongst. There are people that were in my life a year ago that no longer are. People that are new in my life in which I never even imagined before. There are some relationships that have taken a hiatus and I am still at a loss as to the why's, what's, when's and where's of their departure. It is in these in which I wish to comment today.

I have never claimed to be a perfect person. Although, sometimes, my direct, aggressive and confrontational nature occupies the stage of my little life, before the curtain closes, my loyalty, sincerity and kindness will always close the show. As previously noted in my previous blog, I no longer feel that I am in the place to "fight" for those relationships that no longer exist. However, I would be lying if I said that I didn't miss them. Because I do not know why they have ceased to exist in my life, I am at a loss. It is as if they are unfinished chapters. There are times that I feel sad, others upset and then those where I feel indifferent. Mostly, tho, I think I feel a sense of really wanting to understand. I feel that although my "first face" of being aggressive, etc is what most know, when it comes to my inner circle the last face is the one that sustain these relationships. So I have to wonder if somewhere down the line either I left or these relationships made a hard exit to the door before the saw the last act?
I don't know...either way...the bottom line is that even if I have let some down. Disappointed. Angered. Caused them to feel left. I still haven't let go.

I don't want this entry to be somber. However, it is something that continues to sit at the forefront of my mind. I know, I know, some might say, "well com front them". Problem is that I have. Over and over and there is little to no response...and it is in that that I must move on. I guess these few scribed words are just ramblings...

I apologize it has been a while since I last wrote. Things have been quite scrambled. The combination of doctor's appointments and the constant wondering (not worrying) has plagued much of my time. HOWEVER, in the next breathe, so has the preparations for the upcoming nuptials. We got the pictures from the "Engagement Photos" back. I was pleased with how they turned out! (I have attached a few)

Work is cranking and life is moving ever-so-quickly! I was looking at my calender last night trying to sync it up with Terry and the rest of our lives and I am already through the holidays and into February in my head. Lord willing, time will slow for just a moment so that I can inhale the grace around me!

Anyway...I just wanted to check in with you all! (whoever is out there and reads this) LOL!

Tomorrow is the start of Fall! My heart sings!









































PS
A few months ago I blogged about a cake topper I had found. Well, I had one made!
Take a peak! It's Terry, Myself and Bruto, my beloved donkey!!

Feeling depended on.

So the other day my niece, Abby, and I were hanging out and it was a gorgeous day. There are a bunch of lakes throughout the community and I had been wanting to visit them. So I told Abby, "later on, we'll go to the lake!" The morning came and went and in the afternoon, I decided to pack us a picnic lunch. I loaded our lunch in her little wagon, she sat in the wagon with her big water bottle in hand and I attached portable speakers to my IPOD and hit the country music. She says, "music? music?" (She repeats everything at LEAST twice these days or until you acknowledge her.) I say, "yes, music."

I grab the wagon by its handle and off we go! It was SO neat! I could write an entire blog about that hour with her at the lake! It was really NEAT! BUT....I digress. At one point of our visit to the lake, we wound up at the swings. I wasn't sure if she was going to get on them because I remembered that Corrie had told me that Abby didn't like the swings and wanted to have nothing to do with them the last time they were there. But these days, it seems Abby changes her mind about what she likes and doesn't like daily. So I asked her. "You want to go on the swings? Quieres ir en el columpio?" (My attempts at helping her be bi-lingual, I repeat everything in English and Spanish) She looks at me and says, "Lumpio". AHA! I take that to mean, "sure, I'll try!" SIDENOTE: These days Abby is getting REALLY good at saying NO. Not only does she say NO, she follows it with Momma. Since Corrie spends the most time with her, Abby now says, "No (pronounced with a Y as in nyo) Momma!" So when she doesn't want something, she says, "no momma". If she repeats it, it means yes.
BACK TO THE STORY: I am excited to do all I can to make her LOVE the swings! So I make a decision that I am not going to throw her on the pony alone. I sit in the swing and tell her, "You can sit on Tika's lap. Ven". She lifts her arms at me, I pick her up and sit her on my lap. And we are off! My feet are still touching the ground...(Uh...for all you smart alec's out there that want to take this as an opportunity to take jabs at the fact that, yes, I AM touching the floor...guess what?? It's a BLOG! That means only I get to be heard...not you! HA! HA! So keep your little, short comments to yourself....oh wait! YOU HAVE TO! HA!) ...I digress.
We go forward and back, forward and back slowly. Her hands are free and she is not sure what to do with them. I tell her, "You can put your hands here. Pon tus manos aqui." I take her right hand and put it on the chain. As I do that, she starts to say, "no. no." and starts wiggling. OH NO! I am failing at making her love the swings! I tell her, "it's OK. Ticka's not going to let you fall. You can trust me." I slow down how fast we are going and start swinging slowly and as she leans her little body towards my chest, resting the back of her head just under my neck, I feel her little hands grab each pocket; one on the right, one on the left. She mumbles softly, "Trust Tika." She repeats it a few times and settles in. We go back and forth for what felt a long time in silence. As I heard the squeaking of the chains on the swing and felt Abby's little body lounging on mine as I swung us back and forth, her two little words kept ringing in my mind.

I'm not a parent. I may never be fortunate enough to be called "Momma". And people always say that no one can understand for a moment what it is like to be a parent. To that, I whole heartedly agree! Even as I sit and scribe this now, my eyes water. It's not overly dramatic that my niece needed to depend on me for a kidney transplant or saving her from a moving truck or anything like that. In fact, Abby didn't even need me. When she was saying, "trust Tika", she wasn't asking it as a question. She was saying it like, "I trust Tika." Just a matter of fact. I have been Blessed to have spent much time with MANY kids. Many kids that opened their lives to me. To this day, I still call them "kids", but they are far from it. And they still allow me to be in their lives, for some crazy reason!

That moment on the swing with my niece made me remember what it felt like to be needed. To feel like someone is depending on me and they trust that I am not going to let them down. I think for a season, I have mis-placed that desire and finding joy in people needing me....people depending on me. Not to say that I had abandoned all responsibility...but just to say that I think I have let life get too busy and I haven't made time for one of the things that make me....well....me!

I had such a neat time at the lake (have I already mentioned I had a neat time at the lake???!).
I totally plan on doing it again! Me, Abby, her big water bottle, her little red wagon, and my pink IPOD....LOVE it!

PS
Tonya, Brianna, Missa, I will make the time this week to call you! I'm sorry I've been a slacker but you know I love you regardless!! (0=

Stuck...

Stuck right in the middle of expecting everything and nothing at all.....

that's all I've got tonight.....

Have a good weekend.

Chasing Windmills

It was once said to me, "you're just chasing windmills."
I didn't understand what they meant when they said that to me, so, in my normal Lizzie self, I asked for further clarification.

They went on to explain it is a saying referencing the story of Don Quijote.
If you don't know the story, here is a quick summary....lizzie-style!

It's about a man that is obsessed with reading stories of chivalry, knights and the such. He spends night and day engrossed in the text that fills the books around him, not even stopping to eat. He has a house attendant that watches him turn into this crazed man. He is so obsessed with these stories that he starts concocting this imaginary life of him being a knight. In the neighboring village, there is a woman whom he fantasizes to be his damsel in distress. He puts together his armor made out of scraps and sets out to free her from her distress. (Of course, I am totally oversimplifying the story greatly) Essentially, he creates his nemesis and his largest opponents are these "giants that roam the land". To everyone else they are windmills. He sets out to rage a war with these giants and eventually goes completely crazy and dies in his fantasy.

Essentially, what they were saying to me when they said that I was "chasing windmills" is "you are creating something that is not and making into a war that you will never win...there is no winning or loosing when it is all made up in your head."

This was said to me about a year ago and at the time, I was like, "uh huh....ok...onward!" as I totally disregarded their comment. However, the other day, it came to my remembrance and I couldn't help but ponder it.

Do I create things to be what they are not? Do I make a mini-war with these things and maybe even cause myself some craziness as I try to figure them out and find a solution or process?

HHMM...well, after much thought, this is what I say...

Yes! Maybe I do. I think a lot of my wars, however, are with myself. I create these illusions of what, who, how I am supposed to be, act, look like, say, etc. It is because of these imaginations of what, who and how that I think I sometimes live in a life that is farce. I think I, at times, don't let things just be. I dissect them and interrogate myself or those around me about certain things to a point that is maddening. As much as I say, "it is what it is", I think there are times that my mind doesn't rest and these crazy wars wage in my mind and trickle down becoming a heart issue.

So...
they (I have NO idea who "they" is, by the way!) say that the first part of fixing a problem is admitting there IS a problem, So here I am, on a night where I hear Hurricane Gustav's winds tapping on my window that I say,

"Hi! My name is Lizzie and I sometimes chase windmills."

There! I said it. So as the night's hours tic on tonight, I sit in my comfortable green chair and battle the crazy little ideas that rage in my head and meditate on the fact that it is probably, most likely just me turning windmills into giants. If I take a moment, breathe in, exhale, rub my eyes, clear my head and re-open my eyes ever-so-slowly, I may see that they are indeed, just windmills!!

I am thrilled!!!



Take a close look at this picture. I found it on the internet...Don Quijote is hiding behind his shield and it has the reflection of the windmills.....I thought it was cool!

How about them COWBOYS!!

WOW!

To be a football fan is one thing.
To be a fan of AMERICA's TEAM is another.

What a GREAT thing!

If you know me, you know that I absolutely enjoy my football and I especially enjoy my Cowboys.
When I moved to Dallas last year, I thought that for SURE I was going to get to finally see them play live. The season came and went last year and I never got to see them. (sad santa tears)

This year (even tho it was pre-season) I got to see them! WOW! What a GRAND experience! It TRULY makes my heart glad! I was ecstatic to get to be at Texas Stadium. I was ecstatic to see so many people sporting Cowboys gear all around me. There was and energy in the air like the one I used to feel on Friday night football games in High School. (If you're from Texas, you know what I mean) It was electric!

However, my excitement was tempered after we got to our seats. Can you say STINKIN' HOT! Oh my goodness! It was SO hot! I mean, I was happily wearing my Romo jersey, but after sitting there a few minutes, I would much rather have been wearing a T-shirt. And the cap on my super thick, curly head was trapping all the heat. I felt like I was going to pass out! We sat there waiting for kick off and of course the energy in the place was immediately sparked when they starting setting everything up for the players to come back out on the field. As excited as I was, I couldn't get my mind to settle down about how HOT it was. (Have I mentioned that it was hot?)

Anyway, it was quite the night! I have to say that it goes down in the books for being one of the coolest things I've ever done, but next time(and there WILL be a next time) I am going to make sure that I go when the weather has cooled down.

Along the football vein, this year is my flagship year for having my own football team. Of course, I am referring to fantasy football! LOL! I am THRILLED! My team, Abby's Boys, stands a great chance and I am super excited! I will DEFINITELY keep you posted on how my team is doing.

(she exhales in great contentment)

...so glad football season is back!!!

Single -vs- not Single

All kinds of things swirling through this crazy, little mind of mind lately.

But right now, I will just chat on one.

Single vs not single. Let me define what I mean by single and not single first. When I refer to single, I mean, not attached, maybe just dating. When I say not single, I mean married or living with someone.

Let's start with a story, shall we?

Back when I was in CA, there were a few times that there were people/kids living with us. ("us" being my ex-husband and I) Most of the time, they were kids, ages 20+. It was always very interesting to me how we hardly ever saw them. They would leave early, be gone most the day and night and then appear some time late at night. On weekends, we hardly ever heard much from them. Then when they were home, I would hear them on the phone til all hours or they were up doing this or that.

I remember thinking to myself, "WOW! They are hardly ever home. And when they are home, they are engaged in something. Do they ever sleep? That is crazy! How can they function? What do they do all day?" I even went so far as thinking sometimes, "They have no peace, always running."

Life has a strange sense of humor! In this current life, I find myself living a very similar life. I find that I hardly sleep (most of my blogs are written between the hours of 1am- 3am), When I do sleep, it is til about 9a (when most people are at work or at school), and I am hardly ever home.

I got to thinking. What is the deal? How is it that life changes so drastically from being single to not single?

So, I started evaluating the situation.

Here are some thoughts:
When you are "not single", there is a routine. There are two lives that are intertwined and I think it helps establish a "pace". It is comfortable to be home. To just be. And for the most part, there is an established life. There is a comfort to it all. You don't feel you need to be on your phone or computer communicating with others because the one you want to communicate with lives with you. It is not a matter of "if" you are going to see them or what plans you are going to make, it is "when" they will be home or what you are going to do.

Not to say that there is no comfort or established life in the single life, it is just different. It seems there is a different kind of freedom, per sei. I think when you are single, there is always something to do. There is a certain unbridled freedom of coming and going, keeping up with the events of the area, doing dinner here or there, etc. It seems that a lot of your life is constantly on the move.

Of course, there is access. I know there are times that I myself can and should spend more time just being, but I guess I just feel like I would rather be doing this or that.

And it really has nothing to do with "not having peace" as I used to think before, I think it is just part of the single terrain. I guess once I settle down with someone again, my life may move back to the slower pace??

Eh....just some random thoughts today!

Speaking of random...
Here is a pic of my Bro, Nate, my sis-in-law, Corrie and niece Abby. I think it is so funny because it is so random. I was like, "let me get a picture of the happy family!" Corrie and Abby put on their biggest smiley face and Nate, being Nate puts his arm around Corrie all awkward and throws on his face....LOL! SUCH a dork! But I LOVE THEM!!!