Chasing Windmills

It was once said to me, "you're just chasing windmills."
I didn't understand what they meant when they said that to me, so, in my normal Lizzie self, I asked for further clarification.

They went on to explain it is a saying referencing the story of Don Quijote.
If you don't know the story, here is a quick summary....lizzie-style!

It's about a man that is obsessed with reading stories of chivalry, knights and the such. He spends night and day engrossed in the text that fills the books around him, not even stopping to eat. He has a house attendant that watches him turn into this crazed man. He is so obsessed with these stories that he starts concocting this imaginary life of him being a knight. In the neighboring village, there is a woman whom he fantasizes to be his damsel in distress. He puts together his armor made out of scraps and sets out to free her from her distress. (Of course, I am totally oversimplifying the story greatly) Essentially, he creates his nemesis and his largest opponents are these "giants that roam the land". To everyone else they are windmills. He sets out to rage a war with these giants and eventually goes completely crazy and dies in his fantasy.

Essentially, what they were saying to me when they said that I was "chasing windmills" is "you are creating something that is not and making into a war that you will never win...there is no winning or loosing when it is all made up in your head."

This was said to me about a year ago and at the time, I was like, "uh huh....ok...onward!" as I totally disregarded their comment. However, the other day, it came to my remembrance and I couldn't help but ponder it.

Do I create things to be what they are not? Do I make a mini-war with these things and maybe even cause myself some craziness as I try to figure them out and find a solution or process?

HHMM...well, after much thought, this is what I say...

Yes! Maybe I do. I think a lot of my wars, however, are with myself. I create these illusions of what, who, how I am supposed to be, act, look like, say, etc. It is because of these imaginations of what, who and how that I think I sometimes live in a life that is farce. I think I, at times, don't let things just be. I dissect them and interrogate myself or those around me about certain things to a point that is maddening. As much as I say, "it is what it is", I think there are times that my mind doesn't rest and these crazy wars wage in my mind and trickle down becoming a heart issue.

So...
they (I have NO idea who "they" is, by the way!) say that the first part of fixing a problem is admitting there IS a problem, So here I am, on a night where I hear Hurricane Gustav's winds tapping on my window that I say,

"Hi! My name is Lizzie and I sometimes chase windmills."

There! I said it. So as the night's hours tic on tonight, I sit in my comfortable green chair and battle the crazy little ideas that rage in my head and meditate on the fact that it is probably, most likely just me turning windmills into giants. If I take a moment, breathe in, exhale, rub my eyes, clear my head and re-open my eyes ever-so-slowly, I may see that they are indeed, just windmills!!

I am thrilled!!!



Take a close look at this picture. I found it on the internet...Don Quijote is hiding behind his shield and it has the reflection of the windmills.....I thought it was cool!